Welcome to the Emotional Connectivity Podcast of Talent Management Academy!
To actively listen helps to identify language that seems to be misleading and thus to avoid misunderstandings. This was Rolf’s topic of his last week podcast giving you examples for reflection.
“All people are equal?!”
”All people are equal“… before the law I would add and I am thinking of our Basic Constitutional Law and of the German State in terms of equality and that each independent being must be treated equally by the law. We know however that humans are diverse and – to be honest – how boring would it be if we were all looking alike, thinking and feeling the same… But there is this saying “Birds of a feather flock together” and that means nothing else than that we like to be with people who are similar to us.
Today I am asking you how do you recognize that you are well connected to your counterpart? And when do you feel good especially with people that you don’t know getting into a conversation? On the other hand, what situations do you know remembering your first glimpse with the result in mind “oh no, never ever and no-go…“
I am going to invite you to an experiment that again starts with you as observer. Observe and listen in your next meeting with a person of your choice. Is she or he in a good mood, do you perhaps feel good vibes during your conversation and do you feel emotionally connected in that moment? Are you both in the mood, how exactly does the voice of your counterpart sound and how do you speak in return? What can you observe by facial expressions and gesture during your discussion? And how do you behave when you discuss? You may recognize that you actually looking for a perfect match in posture, gesture and behavior in addition to the common ground in terms of topics you have.
How about not having “good chemistry” and you even may feel something like antipathy? That could be a silly thing if it happens in case of your new boss… in how far you can counteract at all? I would recommend you to give a second chance to make a first impression. It may help to consider very carefully what exactly it is that irritates you and in how far it is related to yourself. Maybe the person even reminds you of somebody who had bad, negative experience with you in the past? Check out in the next step whether you can focus more on positive qualities of your boss thus developing a broader tolerance and understanding.
How about a reframing at last: “All people are equal“ is equivalent to “all people are in the same boat“. By the way, this is even more the case in pandemic crisis times that we are going through at present. Coming closer together as human family creates a feeling of emotional connection – a solid foundation for the WE. Will you join?
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