Welcome to the Emotional Connectivity Podcast of Talent Management Academy!
“I can’t do it”
In last week’s podcast, Rolf talked about the inner resistance and what words like “can, should, must” may provoke in you. Today I am asking you directly: How often did you answer by “I can’t do it“? And what exactly did you mean at that time? Let’s have a closer look…
The word “can“ indicates that something is possible and we take it for granted that we have capabilities and competences in mind. Thus let’s explore the “cannot“: after tomorrow there will be an exam and you don’t feel sufficiently prepared. “I can’t do it“, raising the question I would ask: “What are you afraid of?“
Next example – the customer asked you to hold a presentation in the following week, in front of 20 people. I hear you saying “I can’t do it“ – imagine you could, how would that be?
Last example: Your girlfriend recently divorced and has been permanently complaining to you. After numerous conversations with her you are thinking “I can’t hear that any longer“ and what you actually mean is “I don’t want to listen that any longer.
Summarizing “I can’t do it“ has a lot of connotations – if you ask questions to the person that is talking to you, you will take an active part in communication and you’ll get to the bottom of the underlying cause. The way of how you ask questions is useful to gather information, clear what is meant and make room for choice. Here we go – observe situations in the next week, when you or other people use “I can’t do it”. And when it comes to you personally I give you a tip at last: Don’t believe everything you think!